How to Alchemize Loneliness, Longing or a Broken Heart this Valentine's Day

Kate Harlow: 00:00:00

And I think you know, with this idea of loneliness and broken heartedness, it's like we all have guards. If you are lonely or broken hearted, you've got you have walls around your heart that aren't real, right? And there's practices you can do and perspective shifts you can take with yourself and other people, so that you're not carrying the weight of the story anymore and you're actually allowing yourself to just be present with each experience. Because you and I do that with people all the time. Someone else will be like, That guy's an asshole, that woman's a bitch. And we were like, oh, cool, let's go in and then, like, see what we can do. And we just, like, bring our hearts wide open and and do our best to just be present with them and curious and watch their guards come down.

Catherine Danieli: 00:00:45

Hi. You're listening to Kate and Katherine,

Kate Harlow: 00:00:48

and we're going to show you how to find your Prince Charming so that you can finally live happily ever after, forever and ever No, we are definitely not gonna do that.

Catherine Danieli: 00:01:04

We are sick of that story, and it's a lie. It is a lie. You're listening to the new truth a modern Woman's Guide to extraordinary love.

Kate Harlow: 00:01:14

We are going to show you how the fairy tale, love story stops you from experiencing the love you truly desire. Listen

Catherine Danieli: 00:01:21

to hear how to break free from sacrifice and struggle in relationship,

Kate Harlow: 00:01:26

and learn the new truth about love in a way that you've never heard it before. We're so happy you're

Catherine Danieli: 00:01:33

here. Keep listening.

Kate Harlow: 00:01:38

Hello, beautiful. Happy Valentine's week, wherever in the world you are, this is a really special episode. I'm so excited to bring to you. Bring to you my, my, we were trying to decide what she is. I'm like, she's more than a best friend, soul mate, she's more than a soul mate. She's more than a soul sister. Mariana las who those of you who've been listening to the podcast for a while, how many times have you been on the new truth? Two? Two times. Okay, this is her third appearance on the new truth. And Marianna and I have done a few retreats together. We went to Kenya together twice in the last year, I guess that was last year. Now we're now in 2025 we did a retreat in Sedona together. There's talk of future retreats, but right now they're on hold because Marianna is focusing on her film TV career. She's an extraordinary writer and a coach. She has led many retreats with her company called travel within retreats, she is a next level human, which is why she the love of my life. That kind of feels accurate, which is, oh, it's Valentine. Time. Marianna, yeah, we have even have a name together. So you are the love of my life. Katyana is our name, Kate and Marianna. We also have a baby calf that's nine months old that lives in Kenya, named after us, named katiana, which in Swahili we found out when we were there, means the seductive one. So we are both very seductive. And you know, we met back in 2018 and I'll kind of refresh our story a little bit, because definitely, there's probably a lot of new listeners who don't know you yet, but Mariana and I met in 2018 and we we a mutual friend, Marla, who we had on the podcast a few months ago, introduced us, and we met in London, and it was love at first sight. For me, I don't know maybe you were slightly overwhelmed by all the stories I shared with you in a short amount of time, but we had such a beautiful instant connection. And then I went to lead an immersion. I was actually on my way to lead the immersion in Greece, and Marianna is also Greek, so we have a lot of synchronicities here. So she flew back to, or pardon me, I flew back to London at the end of the immersion, and met up with Marianna again, because I was in London for 24 hours, met up with her for dinner at the time, where she got the news that her spiritual teacher of the past 10 years, who was like a dad to you, you shared with me, who she worked very, very closely with, had just passed away. So we that was kind of like the beginning of the maybe one of the closest relationships I've ever had. We have a lot of connection. We we do a lot together. We travel a lot together. We've created a lot together. We enhance each other's lives in so many ways. And I feel like you took my growth to the next level with the embodiment of how you live your life. Yes, so I wanted to bring you on here on Valentine's week, and I love that we're having a conversation for women who are feeling lonely this week, maybe broken hearted, feeling that sense of emptiness and longing for partnership, or feeling devastated that maybe someone left, or you've lost someone you love, it can bring up so much emotion for people, and I just feel like you have been the gateway for me to live deeper from the Truth of My Heart and just watching you how you walk through the world and how you navigate everything that arises in your life. So welcome back.

Marianna Ladas: 00:05:41

Thank you. Oh my gosh, wow. What a lovely introduction. And I feel your love every single day, and I'm just so grateful for you beyond words, so I'm just really happy to be here, and especially for Valentine's Day, I think there's a lot we can kind of talk through. And, yeah, share, because this is our language, love language, and so it's perfect for Valentine's Day. Yeah, and I just thought about actually, when you were talking about the the the brokenheartedness and the longing for love, and I remember feeling that so intensely for so many years of my life. And you know, thank you for bringing up Carl, because he was such a connection for us when we met that day. And yeah, it was like we had picked up from past lifetimes. You know, just it felt like we knew each other for longer than five minutes, and that's for sure. And and how much our relationship has grown over these last you know, I guess six years or plus, that we've known each other. And I remember the times where I felt lonely and and many times broken hearted over past relationships, and also that pining when I didn't have a relationship. So I felt all the all of those feelings, and I can say how, looking back on that, how that's evolved over time, and Carl was such a huge mentor to me for seeing the relationship of myself to myself, and I used to feel that way when I wasn't connected, and that was like the core thing that He taught is that he helped me to come back to that core spiritual connection that lies within the body, because it's an embodied experience, and he taught a lot of embodiment exercises, but more importantly, he carried a frequency within him of that connection to spirit, of that connection to heart that he transferred over to myself and to all of the people that he was around. And so I realized that is such a gift to be able to carry that connection and to to come back home, essentially, to to yourself and and to be able to give that gift everywhere you go. And then what happens in that is that you become a flame to and a mirror to other people's hearts, so they can remember to connect back to that place. And so I remember that he used to say, every time you feel lonely, or every time you feel broken hearted, it's actually not your heart, it's actually your mind that's telling you that it's your mind, because the mind operates, operates in polarity consciousness. It's, it's it's divided. It sees everything divisive, like I am separate from you, and you are separate from me. We are separate from each other, but in in the heart, we're actually fully connected. We are one. When you know, people talk about that one love, that one spirit, that's that's through the lens of the heart, and when you and we all have access to it, that's the beautiful thing. Is just that we've forgotten. Because we have all of these ways that we unplug from that connected space. You know, with technology and social media now it's like consistently disassociating us, but we have access to it, and it's it lives inside of us, and he was the first person who led me back to that place and since then. You know, there are very few times that I do feel lonely, whether I'm completely by myself or or even with a lot of people. Because sometimes we can feel even lonely with a lot of. People around us, right? Doesn't matter. But when you are truly connected, you will, you will maybe feel loneliness for moments, but that is just a sign that, oh, wait a minute, I'm just not connected. That is my mind's perception of me being lonely. That is my mind's perception of needing somebody out there to make me feel whole. That is all coming from the mind's perception that is based on polarity consciousness that is meant to protect us from the world in that way of it's like a protective mechanism, but when we drop back into the heart, we're whole there and, and that is what, you know, we call you, and I talk about, like living through that the lens of the heart.

Kate Harlow: 00:10:53

Yeah, and this is the Valentine's gift for you all my hope that, my hope is that this conversation activates your heart and allows you to start to feel the frequency that we're talking about because, and I'm a mat, and I imagine, no matter how you're feeling right now, you have experienced moments in your life where you feel that, you know maybe it's at the end of a yoga class in shavasana, and You just feel this like sense of everything's calm, everything's connected. You walk out, you see people more clearly, you connect more. You feel more like you want to make eye contact, or maybe it's after a dance class or singing in a choir or walking through the forest. But you know, I think certainly if we can remember back to being little kids. We all felt that way when we were little. And if you can't find a memory, I'm sure you know a little one. I look at my niece, who's two years old, and she is pure love. She's like the most loving little creature I've ever met, and it's so beautiful to witness her, you know, discover herself and and walk through the world as love, like the love. And this might sound cliche, but it truly is the core of who we all are. And I think that you know you and I have both been on this personal journey of untethering from the layers and layers and layers of the egoic, conditioned self and really stripping down to the core and being as present as we can be with life and with everything life brings, with our grief, with our loneliness and moments, with our frustration, with our rage, Like we go in and and we'll talk about that today, for sure. But we go in and we feel our feelings fully. We penetrate them. We get to the bottom of them, rather than feeding the story, like you said, of the mind that keeps us trapped in the feeling, we actually feel our feelings, which allows us to move through them and to stay in that frequency of the heart. I was thinking when you first started talking about the heart energy that remember that experience with the taxi driver that I had that you you were booking a taxi for me. I was just arriving in London. It was right before our Sedona retreat, and I was in Greece, and I was flying from Greece to London to stay with you. And then I was flying London to Vancouver, and then I was going to Scottsdale for a bat mitzvah, and then meeting you in Sedona after so we had a couple days in London, and I arrived at the airport. My flight was late, my bag was late, everything was late. And this taxi drivers, you're calling him, he was about to leave. He was so mad, and you were texting me like the taxi driver's really mad. Get out there as fast as fast as you can. He might leave. And so I get out there, and this guy, like, whips over when he sees me, because you had told him I was wearing a pink sweater or something. He whipped over and he, like, threw my bag. He was kind of aggressive with my bags, threw my bags in the trunk. Was so mad. Kept saying, as soon as I got in the taxi, I'm gonna have to pay a fee. I'm gonna have to pay a fine I'm gonna have to pay at the airport. There was some fine because he was over his time limit, or something like that. And I just felt my feet like in that moment. It was a choice point, right? A choice point where I could, like, get into being like, I could shut down, let a protective mechanism kick in and just ignore him. I could try and fight him. I could be annoyed with him or judge him, but in that moment, I could feel his stress, and I was in my heart already, and so I just felt my feet, and I took a breath and I said, maybe something else is possible. Maybe you won't get fined. And he was like, what? And then he gets to the front, and he gets to the to the guy that lets him out of the the traffic area of the pickup area for the airport, and the guard says, Oh, no problem, man, just go ahead. Go ahead. And he was like, what? And then we just started talking, and it was quiet for about a minute, and I think he was just like, diffusing. And then I just started asking. Questions that I got really curious from my heart. Like, Curiosity is a quality of the heart. And I got really curious. And I was just like, tell me about you. Where are you from? Where did you grow up? He was from Sri Lanka. He was telling me about his religion. He was telling me the difference between Muslim and Hinduism. And he had a lot of strong opinions, and I held space for all of them with curiosity, and I was just interested and curious. And interested and curious, kept asking more and more and more questions. And by the end, he was like, so happy. I don't know if you remember, you came outside, and he was just like, Kate, this was so amazing. And it was just like this beautiful experience where I watched his guard come down and and I think, you know, with this idea of loneliness and broken heartedness, it's like we all have guards. If you are lonely or broken hearted, you've got you have walls around your heart that aren't real, right? And there's practices you can do and perspective shifts you can take with yourself and other people so that you're not carrying the weight of the story anymore, and you're actually allowing yourself to just be present with the each experience. Because you and I do that with people all the time. Someone else will be like, That guy's an asshole, that woman's a bitch. And we were like, oh, cool, let's go in and see what we can do. And we just like, bring our hearts wide open and and do our best to just be present with them and curious and watch their guards come down. Yeah, yeah,

Marianna Ladas: 00:16:26

what you said there is, and is something that you've you've really taught me just being around you, and I know that we both do this, but I just had such, I don't know, just joy and pleasure watching you remain open. There's a quality of openness, and it's like so easy to be in the world, especially with all the stuff going on, and to have that be a reason to to shut our hearts down, or to to put a wall that there and and in that experience, and so many experiences I've watched you in as well, is that when we just hold the space and keep our hearts open, we that is an invitation, like we invite people to feel their hearts, and that becomes not only healing and giving the opportunity for them to heal And to open and to trust in life and love again, but it heals us simultaneously. It instead of us shutting down, we get to grow in that experience. We get to open up even more. And just imagine if we all did that in the in the world, because there's so many layers to people, and there's so many like we don't know people's paths and the stuff that they've gone through, and for us to latch on to their own pain and trauma that they're really just trying to escape and lash on to you because they're hurting, because, at the end of the day, they're hurting. And so why like throw fire at that? Why not give that other person an opportunity for to the to experience in themselves and who they truly are, and that is the gift of living in that open hearted space. We heal ourselves consistently. We keep opening that container wider and bigger, and it becomes more expansive, and all of a sudden, from that place, we really magnetize lighthearted people into our lives, that we get to call friends, we get to call love lovers. We get to call business partners. We get to, you know, work with all of that, the environment starts to really change and shift. And we get to give back in that

Kate Harlow: 00:18:52

way. And then you never feel you're never, if your heart's open, if it's open, it's

Marianna Ladas: 00:18:59

all this sudden, you're just like, seeing, like, wait a minute, it was me who's who was closing the door. It was me who was living in that. Because it, in a sense, it's an illusion. It's an illusion that it's a story. It's a story when we are lonely, when we are broken hearted. Yes, there is a feeling to it. Yes, it hurts. And like you said earlier, we can touch upon that. That can be a doorway into feeling the truth of who we are. But in when you go through it, and you come to the other side of it, you actually see, oh, that was the story, that was the illusion. Because I can in this space of who I truly am. I can never be lonely. I can never broke. You can't break my heart. My heart is a force field as brighter than 1000 suns. You can't

Kate Harlow: 00:19:52

break that. So true, isn't that? And I just think like it's it's also part like we've been conditioned around love. Love, the fantasy of love, right? Like, oh, obviously, the first season of the new truth, every episode and but we've also been conditioned a fantasy around heartbreak. And there's something it's like, I'm feeling the energy. And of course, this, like everything we're saying is with so much tenderness and sensitivity and love and compassion, because when you're going through great loss, which a lot of people are right now, whether it's heartbreak from from losing someone you love, or from a big breakup or a big divorce, or from losing a friend, or from losing a loved one, like death, loss, grief like it's big heartbreak, is that big, right? Or entire home, just Yeah, or your entire home, exact, exactly, like all the things happening the world, heartbreak from the state of the world like that. There's, there is a collective heartbreak feeling. It's a feeling, right? If we okay, we can name it as a feeling. It's not to say the feeling isn't true, same with loneliness, but feelings are not a permanent state, right? So when someone is heartbroken for years or months or weeks on end, consistently, they're trapped in a story about the thing, right? And it's almost, it's almost an excuse. And of course, this is coming from your protective mechanism. It's not your fault, but it's almost like a reason to stay in it. And there's a part of you that gets off on that right, that gets off on just like being in it, because there's some, like, some and you can, you can maybe write about this, dig into this for you personally, if heartbreak is something you're going through right now, you know, I think for myself, back when I used to have really long heartbreaks, and they were really big and dramatic, and I stayed in them for so long, it was like I got a lot of attention from them. I got a lot of it was like permission to not do anything, to just like be to to rest more or something like, it was almost like I needed an excuse, right? Rather than just like, rather than when you are present in the moment with yourself and your life. Actually, I have a story from this morning, and it's heartbreaking. I haven't told you yet. I have this woman who I'm in love with, who goes to the coffee shop. I go to every day, or not every day, but I see her, you know, once a week. And she's the sweetest woman. She's Greek. She is a doctor. She's 71 years old. I've told you about her before. She is a rock climber, like an actual rock climber, still at 71 she's a golfer, she's a skier, she's a tennis player, and she does all these things like every day. She's so active. She's a world traveler. And I just went to the coffee shop this morning, and I haven't seen her since I got back from Kenya. It's been a few weeks. And she said, Kate, Kate, moo How. How was Kenya? Tell me everything. And I sat beside her, I gave her a big hug and shared a little bit about Kenya. And then she put her hand on my knees, and I looked into her eyes, and I was like, is everything okay? And she's like, her husband had a heart attack and just died. Christmas. Hurt not husband, partner of 10 years, her adventure buddy. He was from Africa, from Tanzania, the loveliest guy. He and I talked about Africa. I told him all about Kenya. He was the loveliest guy, and they had the most beautiful relationship later in life, the last 10 years, her adventure buddy like they had the best time together. December 27 they were on a holiday, and he just had a heart attack and died. And she's a doctor, no signals, nothing. And you know, she's in her heartbreak, right? She's in the feeling of heartbreak. And I said, What are you doing? And she said, I just cry every day. And I said, Great, perfect. That's it. Like she's just feeling her feelings, because she just lost this tremendous person in her life, and she's feeling her feelings, and she, her best friend was with her, whose husband just left her four months ago. So they've, like, tag teamed and become even closer. And they said, she said, I'm going for through my grief, and I'm also going to go on some adventures. Maybe we'll come to Kenya with you, thinking of going to Tanzania, where he's from, and her, her best friend, said, we're going to go everywhere. We're going on adventures. This is a new chapter for both of us, and we're in it together. And I was like, That, is it? They were representing exactly this, like she's sitting there in the coffee shop, not afraid to feel her feelings, sharing her with her heart, openly about what's going on for her, and is also planning trips and doing things and not to avoid right? She's grieving, but she's also living. She's not alone in the basement, holding on to the grief and creating walls around her heart, but actually, with her heart open, is going through the experience with the people that she loves. It was so beautiful, like, exactly what? And that just happened this morning that I found that

Marianna Ladas: 00:25:05

out amazing. And that's similar to what we were just talking about earlier, where we get to bring that space in for other people, to open their hearts. It's like, that's the same thing we can do with grief and the feelings, right? So we bring that grief or sadness or anger or rage, whatever is the feeling that comes through, and we can hold it in that open hearted space. That's where the healing is. That's when the feelings start to transmute and alchemize and then return back home to love. Some people feel like I can't have I can't feel both. It's actually not true. It's like bringing the sadness and the star so in the present moment, fully feeling with the open heartedness, without, like censoring, without shutting down, without trying to control it, but just being really, truly, beautifully present with all of those feelings. And then they go back to source. Well, source is wholeness. Source is that place of who we are, in that state of of love. So we get to return home. And all of those opportunities are opportunities to come back home to our wholeness, and that's when you know that's what you were talking about. There's that difference about just lingering there and just replaying the story and using it as an opportunity to feel more, to to to expand more in our in the consciousness of love. So all of these are our opportunities to go in that another thing that I remembered as you were talking Kate is speaking with about a woman who's actually going through a heartbreak right now that I'm working with a little bit and this, this this is an interesting thing a lot of the times, especially when we go through a breakup, and we place so much of our identity on that other person, of also, of like, okay, for instance, I dated this One guy because I thought he was powerful and I wasn't. He was the the saw the the angelic one, or he had these certain qualities that I perhaps didn't feel 100% in myself. So those types of breakups, I realize are that much more intense or harder, because we placed our value and identity onto the other person. And so then that feels like a quote, unquote loss, right? Because we feel like we're losing something that we already have inside of it. We've just misplaced it in somebody else and said, Oh, you have it, but I don't have it. And again, that's the story, that's the illusion. And we do that with people all the time. That's where jealousy stems from, right? I'm jealous of you because I think you have something that I don't. I

Unknown: 00:28:15

do that's true, that's true.

Marianna Ladas: 00:28:17

You have blonde hair and I don't,

Kate Harlow: 00:28:21

you have brown hair, and I don't,

Marianna Ladas: 00:28:28

but it's, it's that, it's that, you know, and,

Kate Harlow: 00:28:33

yes, that's such a good point. I think that's the old paradigm. That's the old paradigm of love, which is, like, really, all we've learned up until the new truth podcast and anything like it, the old paradigm of love is extractive love. It's like I am empty inside, so I need a partner to feel like circling back to loneliness, right? I'm empty inside. I need a partner to fill something in me. I need I feel bad about being single, I feel bad about being alone, so I need someone else to be with me so I feel better about that, right? And we're trying to fill something in ourselves with someone else, which is impossible. And then I think of, you know, all the women in the world right now who are, who are laying in bed, maybe not in this moment, while some might be in this moment, laying in bed next to someone, and they feel lonelier than they've ever felt in their fucking lives. They think that they look at the single women, and the single women are so free and can do whatever they want and are so happy, and can choose what they choose, and can date whoever they want, and they feel like they're in prison of loneliness like Elizabeth Gilbert and Eat, Pray, Love. You know, she had it all, and she was lonely as fuck. And then we look at the single women who are looking at the married women saying, Oh, they have something I don't have. I'm so lonely. I need a guy laying in the bed next to me so I feel, don't feel, this pain that's extractive love. That is, I mean it, when you think about it, it's kind of sick. It's kind of. It's, it's kind of twisted that we've been taught that, like somebody else is going to give us something to make us feel better, because, like, how horrible is that pressure to put on somebody else to make them responsible for you not feeling that pain? Right? Your pain is your own, and your pleasure is your own. Everything you feel in relationship, like when you and I go to Kenya and get high on all the people we're so in love with, there we are feeling our own hearts. That's the love we're feeling, the love in our own hearts, right? And in those lonely moments, the woman in the bed next to the guy, she's not feeling lonely because of him. She sure thinks it's because of him, but it's because she's disconnected, like you said in the very beginning, from her own source, from her own wholeness, from her own I think of the ace of cups from the tarot deck. For any Tarot fans out there, there's this beautiful picture on our favorite tarot deck. The light Sears, and it's this overflowing heart that's like a fountain. And I always it's one of my favorite visuals, and or the other one that has a golden chalice that's overflowing, that's what's inside of every single one of us. And when you connect with someone or even listen to a podcast that inspires you, read a book that inspires you, watch a show you know, go to a dance class, sing in a choir like we like anything you do that has you feeling so alive is not the thing itself. That thing activated the fountain and the connection to the source of who you are. And, you know, we Catherine, and I've said it in so many ways, and like we'll tell you 10 million times, and and it's a journey and a practice to learn how to come home and connect with this part of you, but in that relationship, you know you were feeling you, and the illusion the mind has is that was them, right? Of course, we love people and the what the gift that they bring to our lives, but when someone leaves, we think a part of ourselves is gone, which is what you just said. But you're not gone that and so what is the thing that that person that you felt, you experienced with, that person that you're that you're forgetting, is already inside of you, because nothing has left you. Everything you're looking for is inside.

Marianna Ladas: 00:32:19

It's inside. And you know, when we're not in that place, when we're plugged into that fountain that well, that exists there infinitely and abundantly, and it is placed in in the illusion of that, it's the other person or the other thing externally, that's the the basis of a co dependent relationships, yes. So if you're, if you're coming from that place and you're looking for love and you're going on dates and stuff like that, you're basically setting the tone to jump into a co dependent relationship. And then, yeah, and then you get there, and you go, Oh, guy. And then, and then it's almost like you you start sabotaging it in some way, because the truth is, is that you already have what you need. And so you're trying to get it from somebody else, which is the falsehood of it all. And then you don't get it, because the point of origin of where you're coming from is coming from a place of lack. So then you're putting out this lack consciousness, and you're trying to get it, and you're just on this hamster wheel of trying to get something and and you just keep going. It's like this endless carrot Chase.

Kate Harlow: 00:33:33

Yeah, nothing's nothing will ever be enough the chase. And you'll like, order more on Amazon. You'll, you know, get more Botox. You'll try to lose more weight, you'll try to like it, buy more clothes, whatever. The thing is, like, the quest is never enough. You have to go on the internal quest, like you did with Carl, and like I've done, done with all my mentors and teachers that I've worked with over the years, and the awakening and the journey of of really learning how to plug into ourselves, and when we do is like we are plugged into planet Earth, like what is actually here. So for those of you listening, and you know to some people, we might be sounding like we're speaking Greek right now, Marianna does speak Greek fluently. I speak a few words. I speak about 50 words, not, not conversational yet, but, but it might be all Greek to what we're saying, or if you're Greek Mandarin or whatever, like we we might be making no sense if you are so far away from this place. And I know that feeling too. I remember the first time Andy said to me, Oh, I think you need self love. And I was like, what fuck is that? And how do I get that? Like, thinking it's just like a thing you get. You know, it takes time to learn how to plug back into yourself, but I just think, you know, so much of us, so much of the the challenge for the Western. Modern Woman is like the busyness, the addiction to the busyness of life and the stress and life being chaotic and living in cities and being on phones and being on laptops and watching shows and being constantly bombarded with everybody's voice but your own, and constantly disconnected from that beautiful, infinite place that lives inside of you that I know every single one of you has touched upon in a moment in your life, in some way, and some of you, more than others, I think of you know in Africa, like every time you and I, So Mariana and I went to Kenya twice, and we like, every time, like, Okay, the first time you went, and I think I probably shared this last time, because it was right before we were going. The first time you went, she found out about this place, Ola pangi farm. And I'm sure if you're a regular listener, you've heard me talk about it a million times, and she called me and was like, Kate, I found out about this place. We're going to Kenya. And I was like, Cool. Okay, when are we going? And you were like, February for a Ricky trip, and I couldn't make it work, but we I was going to come with you, and you went by yourself for four days. And of course, in my mind, I was like, my conditioned media mind was like, Oh, my God, you're going to Africa by yourself. That sounds so dangerous. Now I laugh at that, because that's just so untrue. And so you went for four days, and I remember you called me and you were you were in the frequency of the heart. You were in it. I could hear the crickets and the creatures. I could hear the singing. It was nighttime. You were like, Katia. We call each other katyana mu, which is Kate and Mariana. Mu means my, in Greek, my Kate or my katiana. So she calls me and says, katiana mu, oh, my God. I wish you could feel what it feels like to be here and you were in tears. And I was in tears, and I was like, I can, I can feel it through the phone, like I could feel it so strongly. And you were like, there's lanterns that light the pathways to all the different bungalows and the different houses. The stars are brighter than any stars I've ever seen in my life, and I could hear the sounds of all the creatures, and I had tears in my eyes, and you were like, oh my god, I can't wait to take you here. I can't wait to take women here. And it was this overflowing feeling, and that's the frequency of the heart. So now it explains our addiction to Kenya, mine, especially because I'm going back next Friday for two months. I am so in love with this place, and a part of it is that the people and the land and the animals and the community and the it just drops me in. I mean, I connect pretty easily to the frequency of my heart now this far, 20 years into my my journey. But when I'm there, it's like, I mean, even when I talk about it, as soon as I say Africa or Kenya, I feel my whole body like softened and open. And I had a client say to me, she when I voxered her from there, she said, Kate, I've like, I've never heard your voice like this before. Wow, this is something else, and it was like deeper than the normal heart frequency that I live in. There's just something about this birthplace of humanity that reminds people of who they are. So if you and Mariana and I are not selling a retreat right now, it's not an invitation to come to Kenya, although, you know, maybe we'll go back one day and bring women there, but, but, I mean, there's places on earth that your heart will be drawn to that will help you drop in to this frequency.

Marianna Ladas: 00:38:55

Also, one of the things that I just read in this amazing book called braiding sweetgrass by Robin wall kimier, Kimmer Kimmerer, it's about Indigenous women, wisdom, sorry, and teachings of plants. But I was reading their scientific research shows that in the soil, in the earth, it releases a chemical inside of our bodies. It releases oxytocin, which is the hormone balance. Oh, the hormone that is the connection hormone. It's the connection hormone that connects mother with baby and also lovers. And so if you think about it, it's like just being close to the Earth. Being in that raw nature, raw Earth, putting your hands in soil, is one of the ways to feel that connection. And that is, I think, one of the key things that we've lost, is being in our bubbles, being. In, you know, just dopamine hit after dopamine hit. You know, on on technology and social media and all that stuff. It's like finding ways to connect to presence, through meditation, through hearing the silence, finding time to just smell the flowers, smell their it's like, almost that simple. It's like, plant a garden, whatever you can do to slow down and feel and put your feet on the ground, so to speak, and be in that natural environment, because that is one of the sure ways to come back home and to remember, and that's why Africa is such an activator, right? We're like, whoa. Why can I feel my heart here so deeply? It's because you're in the middle of nowhere, so to speak, just pure, raw earth and all of the wilderness of the wild animals that are there that add to that. It does feel like you're at the heart of the birth of humanity, and it activates, on a cellular level, that kind of memory of connection, and that's the thing we've lost. So anything that you can do to connect to that place and using meditation and and nature, however close that is to your environment and plug and using that as a way to plug in is one of the ways to find your center. I love

Kate Harlow: 00:41:35

the term plugging in. It feels like, you know, we plug in our phones every day. We plug in our computers. Like, have you plugged into yourself and just thinking as you're sharing that? Like, okay, so if you're lonely and or broken hearted right now, what are you doing? Like, make a list of all the things you've been doing that have been perpetuating that. Right? Are you on your phone constantly? Are you looking at Instagram and comparing yourself to everyone else's life. Are you drinking more? Are you eating tons of sugar and crap? Are you not eating at all? Are you, you know, like, hiding out, watching Netflix every day? Are you beating the shit out of yourself? Are you being mean to yourself? Like, what have you been doing, right? Like, really do an inventory where you list and call it an inventory, like, maybe call it a saboteur inventory to see all the ways your protective mechanisms have been keeping you in the prison cell of the illusion of loneliness or broken heartedness versus the alternative. So switching gears into like, really plugging in means, what are you doing to feed your soul right now? You know it doesn't, and we're not talking about skipping. This is not like, spiritually leap frogging and skipping over your pain. If you're deep in pain, feel it fully. Mariana and I do a lot of embodiment practices where we put music on, and when we're feeling something, we move our bodies to the frequency of the music and the feeling, and let let ourselves fully, let the feeling take over, and let the feeling be through us, yeah, be expressed through the movement. Non linear movement is what I studied that's really helped me move through a lot of feelings, but and singing also, whenever I'm feeling something like, gosh, I share this story, and I've shared this definitely, on the podcast, probably many times, but I had this day in Athens where I was feeling lonely when I first got here, and I never feel lonely now, because my heart's open. So I'm never I'm always alone. Actually, I live by myself on the other side of the world, and I have like, five friends here, but I never feel lonely, because I'm so connected everywhere I go to everyone and so that, I mean, if you are feeling those feelings, I loneliness, I put on Celine Dion all by myself. And I like, I like to ham it up like, well, you and I are quite theatrical, but I think we all are at the core, like we connect with our little three year old selves. And I would sing all by myself at the top of my lungs, and then I sat in the mirror, and I was like, I'm lonely. I'm lonely. And then I started laughing. I was like, what I'm not I'm alone. No, I'm not with myself, and I'm with the divine, and I'm with the planet and the universe, and I'm with all my friends that are all over the world, and I'm with all the people in the coffee shop, and then I cross on the street in the grocery store. And when your heart's open, you actually connect with people, and then you never feel alone. So like we have so much more power than we think we do, yeah,

Marianna Ladas: 00:44:39

and you know, it's, it's also the simplicity of catching ourselves, which sometimes is not so simple actually, but because it runs it, we're used to it just the stories running in the background, and we it's almost like this self hypnotic tape that just runs over and over again. But this is the practice, right? It's the practice. And this is sometimes we we do for. Each other, right? When you say, Oh, I'm this, and I'm like, Oh, that's a really good story. So like, I'm confused, right? Okay, well, if you think if, if I just say I'm confused, then I'm going to stay confused, and then I'm going to make confusing choices, or no choices at all, because I'm quote, unquote confused. Same with loneliness. It's like, if I can have that moment of like, oh, I caught myself saying I am lonely, where I can just catch that thought, drop into the feeling, what's underneath the story. Instead of having it just roll over over and over and over and over again. I can just stop the story and feel the feeling, do something like, sometimes even the silence, of feeling, of that, that feeling can move it through in a matter of seconds. It's

Kate Harlow: 00:45:53

usually fast. It's like usually fast.

Marianna Ladas: 00:45:57

It's almost like we hold the stories hostage. You know, it's like we hold them hostage, and we don't allow them to move through so then we ask ourselves, gosh, is there a part of me that's addicted to, you know, the feeling of loneliness, or just the story of loneliness, or is that actually keeping me from connecting with people,

Kate Harlow: 00:46:18

and keeping me from having what you want, having the life you want.

Marianna Ladas: 00:46:22

Yeah, yeah. So it's, it's a practice, and it's a, it's a practice that we still do, you know, every single day, it's part of of who we are, you know, because we go out in the world, and there is stuff that happens, you know, there, and it's like, but what is our relation to it? What is our relationship to it? Do we use that opportunity to go, Ah, I'm feeling this way. Ah, I caught myself feeling having this thought, how can that move through me and and so I could spend more time in my heart

Kate Harlow: 00:46:55

totally, and then the story, it keeps you there. Like, if you're, if you're trapped in a feeling, it's because there's a story. Yes,

Marianna Ladas: 00:47:03

it's our minds that keep us there. Yeah,

Kate Harlow: 00:47:09

what were you you're just gonna say and and then, and that you're done. And then,

Marianna Ladas: 00:47:13

and then, and then, see the thoughts go fast. I lost it

Kate Harlow: 00:47:20

good. Bye. We needed that. Thought,

Marianna Ladas: 00:47:24

it'll come travel back maybe,

Kate Harlow: 00:47:27

yeah, it's, it's, it's an extraordinary practice, really life changing and really like this, is it? The perspective is I'm responsible for my own feelings and my own life, rather than blaming my ex, blat, was that yours? Was this where you were going?

Marianna Ladas: 00:47:44

No, no, I had the thought. Actually, I remember, hold on,

Kate Harlow: 00:47:48

yeah, that. I mean, that's it. Like we just spend so much time in the stories, blaming other people for how we feel, or in a fantasy that somebody else is going to come along and make how we feel feel better, or someone's going to change so we feel better. And that's just a life, a long life of suffering, suffering when these practices we're offering you today and learning how to really learning how to get intimate, I want to say it's Valentine's week, how to get intimate with the frequency of your own heart, because there's nothing more beautiful than the frequency of your own heart. It is intoxicated. You think it's some guy or some woman or some job or like the frequency of your own heart is the most intoxicating love you will ever feel, and you'll never feel lonely again from that place, because nobody can give you that feeling it's inside. People can activate it for moments. You know, even you see, in long term relationships, nobody can sustain it like that person cannot give you the feeling of connectedness, maybe in the beginning, because they're so present, and they're so with you, and they're trying to get your your love and whatever. And so they show up so fully, and you feel like, Oh my God, I don't feel that lonely feeling anymore. I don't feel that pain underneath anymore. And then one day, life goes on, and either they leave or they stay, but like they're not showing up in the same way. And guess what? It creeps up again because you're make because you're making somebody else responsible for for your own feelings, rather than the power was within you all along. All you got to do is tap in and learn how to tap in, learn how to connect, learn how to feel the frequency of your own heart and live from that place.

Marianna Ladas: 00:49:31

Yeah, yeah. The what I was pondering is that I used to when I was in that space of not being as connected in the past, especially prior towards meeting Carl, that the suffering was felt endless. I felt like the percentage of how much time I spent in suffering or longing or pining or. Or just all of that was the percentage was pretty high. Now the percentage has just switched to the other side. It's like, I'm able to feel pain or deeply too, because we're deep, deep, deep feelers. It's not you're we're not talking about numbing anything here. It's the opposite. It's feeling everything, but to to such a fullness, without escaping it and without the mind just keeping it there, but just it moves through so quickly into the other side that it's like now I spend most of my life in an expansive heart, open space, and a very small percentage of feeling any type of suffering. I do feel suffering in moments, but I feel it fully, and it moves through my body a lot quicker, and then I get to go back to that open, expansive place, even with with things that, like, I think about things in the past, where I'm like, man, if that happened to me 1520 years ago, like, what something that happened with my mom? Or if that happened 1520 years ago, I would have, oh, my God, it would have been just a sheer basket case. Or I wouldn't have been able to deal with that, or I'd be in depression for a long time. I don't feel that anymore. It's because I meet whatever is happening in life with intimacy, with deep, deep intimacy. I'm not trying to fight it or flight. It. Sometimes I do, but then I come back and it we have an opportunity to meet whatever feeling or story with such presence that that is true intimacy. Whatever it is, it's true intimacy, and that is the gate, gateway to love,

Kate Harlow: 00:52:03

yes and love and a life that you love. So as I'm hearing you say this, I want you to share, I invite you to share this last year and all of the magic that came in 2024 like thinking about all the years that you've been feeling, your feels taking responsibility, not being in the story of suffering, but actually alchemizing everything as it comes, and allowing yourself to live an expanded life. Like I was just thinking how you expanded your life is like the gift that came to you in October, like all the places you went this last year. Like Share, share your even just share your travel journeys of what you've where you've been this year,

Marianna Ladas: 00:52:42

oh my gosh. Well, it started off in California, and then it and then we went to Kenya. And

Kate Harlow: 00:52:50

Marianna lives in London. She lives currently, yeah, not for long.

Marianna Ladas: 00:52:56

Not for long. Moving back to California in March. Yeah. It was in obviously, we had the retreat in February, and then in April, I decided to do kind of a mini retreat on the art of manifestation in the quantum field. And as you know, in your similar Kate as well, it's like I like to kind of do and come up with practices before I go on the retreat and actually try them out on for size and see how that goes, so I can better show up at the retreat. And so I was really practicing certain things on the art of manifestation. And it was I focused my energy a lot on this project that I've been writing called Earth keepers. And it's a was originally a written as a film and TV series that now is most likely, likely going to be more than that, an immersive game and platform. I'll probably talk about that in future series, but so I focused my energy around that, and I was currently focusing on getting funding for it. And it was so I went to Idra, which is where I did the retreat, and Kate's done a retreat with me, and idri. There's just a stunning, stunning Villa and

Kate Harlow: 00:54:24

a Greek island. People don't know idri. It's a Greek island with no cars. It's magical. Leonard Cohen had a house there. Yes, it's so beautiful.

Marianna Ladas: 00:54:33

It's heavenly. You can really feel like you're in Greece, like hundreds of years ago. It's so beautiful. And so. So on the second day of the retreat, I woke up to an email that said, Marianna. It was came from, actually, one of Carl's clients, and who's a friend who's like an uncle to me, and I hadn't spoken to him, to him in months, many months, and I received an email. And Marianna, can you talk now? I have potential investors for you, for your for Earth keepers. And I was like, what this was on the second day of the the manifestation, and I've been focusing my energy on that. And, oh, there's a little bit of a backstory to that, which Kate and I were talking about. You know, we've been talking, and I had this kind of download to go to the Cannes Film Festival this year and just go and network. And I was just like, what I think you even mentioned, I

Kate Harlow: 00:55:33

had a download. It was like, it was, I was doing, I'm not a tarot reader, but I was like, doing a Tarot reading. And I was like, I'm getting guided that you're supposed to go to the Cannes Film Festival like so randomly it had no I'd never thought of it before. You'd never mentioned it to me before, and never, I never had that on my body. Else, somebody else told you that. I think it was Shaza, yeah, somebody else

Marianna Ladas: 00:55:52

had said something. And I just kind of like, okay, whatever. And just didn't think about it. But I did go online, and I saw what it would take for me to go, get there, and I'd have to apply for accreditation and pay this amount of money, and, you know, whatever. But I was like, no, no, I have to concentrate on, on, on the retreat right now. And also the three or four days I was thinking of going was when Nick was going to go off on some man's retreat. So I was like, oh, okay, I'm going to go on these exact four days if I go anyways. Long story short, I'm, I'm talking to Alan, the guy who has this possible connection for investment money for my project. And he goes, Oh, by the way, they, a couple of them live in LA and one in Orange from Orange County, which is where I grew up. And he said they're going this year to the canned Film Festival on these exact four days. I was like, You're kidding me. I was like, tell this is the magic of life. This is living in the heart frequency. This is, this is the magic. And, I mean, we've had so many experiences like this. Kate, you and I were just like, it's non stop. We're like, what? We were just having that conversation, and that person shows up and this, you know, it's pure magic. And so then I was like, tell them I will be at the Cannes Film Festival, and I would love to meet them. And there's a whole fun story about that.

Kate Harlow: 00:57:24

Tell that story, because you did exactly what we're talking about there. Okay, yeah, the feelings and

Marianna Ladas: 00:57:31

yeah, this is really good. So, so I hadn't been in that field in a while, because I used to work at Warner and and Sony and Amy networks and in the entertainment industry. But this I hadn't been in that world just post pandemic. So it been a good I bought five years now, four or five years. And so I found myself in the absolute sea of madness of the Cannes Film Festival, where there was, like, Holly, everybody and their mother was was there, and it just felt slightly overwhelming, and all these old feelings started coming up of like, Who do you think you are? You're so invisible, you're tiny. You're never going to get anywhere with this. This is absolutely stupid, like, her

Kate Harlow: 00:58:24

name's Helen, her name's Helen, her saboteur, saboteur name, yeah,

Marianna Ladas: 00:58:28

like, there was there, oh, and, and just I felt so small. And I was like, and then I was trying to also connect with people, and network, quote, unquote, network with people. And I felt this, like wall, nobody was really responding to me. And I felt like I couldn't connect with anybody. And I was like, what is happening here? I'm used to connecting and the magic. And I'm like, dip, was it all lost? Was all the work that I've done for the last however, many years completely futile? What's happening here. And so then at one point, I see these a stretch of of yachts, and people were doing deals on them. And I was like, oh, cool, maybe, maybe I could do my meeting on a yacht. And would it be, wouldn't it be cool to ask, you know, somebody, if I can borrow their yacht for the meeting. I was just playing around in my mind, so but I still felt so disconnected. And I see one with a Greek flag on it, and I was like, I'm gonna go talk to those guys. They're Greek. Surely they're gonna be friendly. And so I walk up to him, and I was like, yes. And they're like, hello. And I was like, Hi. I'm like, this is Mariana. I'm like, this my first Cannes Film Festival. How are you doing? They're like, fine. I'm like, I noticed that there's flags on different yachts. And are these because of the are they representing different film commissioners internationally? And they said, No, these are but I. It, and they was so felt cold and so dismissive. And I was like, that's it. I started. You called me. I called you, and I was like, what is happening? Greek

Kate Harlow: 01:00:12

people are never like that. Like that is so rare.

Marianna Ladas: 01:00:15

Yeah, it was so RAM. Like, okay, something in my field is getting activated right now, I feel like I'm regressing into this, the thing, the parts of myself that I felt consistently around the entertainment industry many years ago. So I said, Okay, Marianna, allow yourself to feel the feelings and do what you teach other women to do. Do what you teach other women to do. So I went to the beach. There was a obviously, it's on the beach there, but nobody's looking at the beach. Nobody's on the beach. I'm like, Why is nobody on the beach? So I sat down, I put my bare feet on sand and next to water, and I just, like, connected with the earth, and I connected with the water, and I just shed some tears there, and I felt the feeling of being alone, and felt also some anger come up. And like I was angry that I wasn't being seen, and I was angry at my invisibility, and I was I was sad and all of the feelings. And I said, I'm just going to feel them all, and I'm going to go into this theatrical expression of whatever was going on. And I did, and I was like, if you know, just let it out. Just basically let it out. And I was even walking around the space and letting it out inside of my head, and I felt like it

Kate Harlow: 01:01:45

just, hold on, hold on. Like, fuck those guys like, judgments, like, so this is such an important Yeah, it's, it's an important practice, because so many women listening are relating to your story right now and relating to feeling that way, and just know that the world around you is only responding to your own wall. So you had all these walls up because all these stories were

Marianna Ladas: 01:02:08

running, which were protective mechanisms, they were protective

Kate Harlow: 01:02:11

mechanisms up, like those people, they're they're assholes, and I, and I don't belong here, and I'm invisible, and blah, blah, blah, and all these stories, right? So that's creating this wall, the shield, around you, so people can't actually see you because of your own shield. You know this? I'm just saying this for everyone else to know, yes, and what you did was you sat down, you reconnected with the frequency of the heart, which is the earth. You connected with the Earth, felt your feelings, and also then let yourself go into the stories and ham them up, amplified them. Yes, fuck those guys. Fuck I told everybody, yeah, exactly. You fully let yourself go there and then carry on,

Marianna Ladas: 01:02:52

and then all of a sudden I started almost like laughing, like it was like a cosmic joke, because it wasn't about them. You know, that's the thing is that when, when you just tell everybody to go fuck themselves, it's not about them, it's just about you having the protective mechanisms and holding on to them. And so it felt like that just completely all of a sudden, I started laughing and finding my energy again, I was like, Oh, there I am. Oh, you know what? On this topic of loneliness, that was the other biggest thing I felt. On walking around amongst like so many people, I felt so alone, so lonely, and I that's something I hadn't felt in a really long time. You're

Kate Harlow: 01:03:40

probably feeling all the actors and like Charlize Theron and feeling all their loneliness, with all the things like with all feeling alone underneath. Yeah, exactly.

Marianna Ladas: 01:03:49

And so again, it was like I felt all of the feelings. And I can't tell you how quickly it transmuted. I all of a sudden, after the a few fuck us and a couple tears and really going so deep in the feeling of it, I came on to the other side. I started laughing, and felt my energy return back to my heart. And all of a sudden, I felt all of the presence of all the women around me that I've ever done retreats with, with Kate, with my partner, Nick, with my mother, with my everybody that was ever dear to me, but especially the women that I've done these retreats with and I've done this work with, and they all showed up, and They're like, You are not alone. And I felt the presence of each and every single one of these women inside of my heart, and they all showed up there. Everyone showed up in my heart. And I was like, oh my god, this is an illusion. I am not alone. I am connected with everything and every. One, I felt the connection to the earth, the ocean, and then all of a sudden, all the people turned into just my brothers and sisters. All the projections just dropped. It wasn't about, oh, the industry anymore. Oh, they were just people. They were just, I could just connect from the heart again. So I walked through and I was like, Oh, that's interesting. It's time for my this premiere. I was going to go see Ron Howard's premier of idea man, which is about Jim Henson's life, which I highly recommend. It's such a beautiful story. And I went over there and I was like, I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I'm just gonna grab a sandwich. And I sat down outside of the premiere, and I was just there by myself, enjoying the view, eating this wrap. And all of a sudden, people were coming up to me. Bunjo Bona petite, how are you doing? Are you coming to see the premiere as like all I was out trying to hustle before and trying to make a connection, and all I found was just walls, because I was in that walled place, because that was what was happening inside of me. And as soon as I dropped that and moved through that energy and alchemized it, everybody just started looking and coming towards me and and and just wanting to connect. And then inside the premiere, I connected with this most lovely, amazing human being who's also a filmmaker. And then afterwards, she was like, You know what? She's like, my plans have changed. She's like, Do you have any dinner plans for tonight? Do you want to go and have dinner with me. And I was like, I sure the heck do Yeah, let's go. We had the most incredible night. We were up until two in the morning, and we just had the most beautiful time. I even forgot about my meeting the next day. I didn't even know where we were going to go. It was just still we hadn't even had a venue set, a meeting place set up yet, and I get a text the next morning for an earlier meeting. And they said, Marianna, we can you meet us instead? Set up at two. Can you meet us at 12 on this particular yacht? So after I go, after I had that experience of even thinking about, Oh, how nice it would be to be on this yacht and do this meeting that manifested without me even having to do anything. They said, Come onto this yacht. I had the most incredible meeting. Met the most incredible people, and they said, Marianna, we've met so many people and had meetings. And you know, they're not all this, this connected and this amazing, and there's so many people just talk the talk, and it's so nice to just get somebody who's authentic. They said that, and I was like, likewise, we we found each other, right? And what I thought was going to be like a half an hour, 45 minute ended up being a half a day spent with them and their families, and had the most incredible day. And we're still in talks of investment, and you know, we've had additional meetings since then, and you know that's been a continuous journey and relationship that we that that's growing since, since that time and last May, since we've met. And I guess that's just one of the examples of of that. And the whole year has just been been incredible. And same with the Yeah, we're

Kate Harlow: 01:08:39

gonna come back to your year. I just want to interject that story. I mean, it just illuminates everything, right? Everything your life is a mirror of what you are projecting onto the world around you. And I was thinking like, how many people out there are teaching manifestation, but people are still like, have all this shit inside that they have it penetrated, all these beliefs, all these stories, all these judgments, all these like that story is this is the metaphor of your life, right? If you haven't penetrated all the layers of like beliefs you have about yourself, that it's not possible, you're alone, you're a loser, you're never gonna have love, you're never gonna have that career that you desire. You're never gonna then nothing will come to fruition. But and manifesting, we don't even have to like we don't even have to know what we're manifesting is like when you actually look in the mirror and face all the projections inside of you that you are tainting the world around you with, and you penetrate them like you did, and you connect with the earth and yourself in a spacious place, and you go into the feelings, and you process the judgments, and you process the projections, and you feel them, and you yell and you sing and you scream and you cry and you shake, and whatever there's there's many ways to do this, but your story was such a beautiful example. You penetrate down. Deeper to back to the root, and the truth of who you are, all of it falls away right when you're not attached to the story, when you're not attached to being right, your ego winning and you're you're willing to just feel them fully, so that they all fall away. Now you attract that which is meant for you. And so, yes, you manifested the the yacht like that. I mean, that was a perfect example of like we actually become absolute attractions to an extraordinary life, and that's what the new truth is all about. Really, is living from the truth of who you are, peeling back the layers of all this crap and bullshit that we're projecting on the world around us, that the world owes us something, that everyone else is responsible for our pain, that everyone else is responsible for giving us pleasure, like when you actually just penetrate all the stuff inside of you and come back to that frequency of the heart, you magnetize an epic, extraordinary life. You had this experience in Cannes. Now you're having all these incredible meetings with these guys, they've opened you up to a whole new world with gaming and taking Earth keepers a different direction. To start, it's still going to be a TV series, probably movies, probably, I mean, worlds upon not. Probably it will be. It's so big this project you have attracted since then so many other people who are getting on board with your vision, investors and directors and different like producers, like you, have attracted so much more creative life force in you to keep contributing to this project you've worked on for nine years. And then you attracted a trip to Egypt, which I'm sure is part of Earth keepers too. And that was, that was in September, a trip that you, you know, both of you, and you and I were invited to, and we both said, No, we're too busy. We've got lots of travel this year. It said, No. And then do you want to share a little bit of that story?

Marianna Ladas: 01:11:54

Yeah. So at one stage, our friend Michelle, who did the artist residency at all pangi farm in Kenya. She invited us to come, and both Kate and I, like she said, we're busy, and I had so much going on, and I kept telling her, no thank you for the invite. But I She's like, That's so weird. I really feel like you're meant to be there. And I was like, You know what? Me too. I had this really strong intuitive feeling that I wanted to be there and that that I not even like a need, but it's like I was pulled. It was a it was a calling to be there. But, you know, I said, I said to her, I trust life so much right now, and I have been, but it's just like the way life works, that I know that if I'm supposed to be there, I just will, like something will happen, and I will just be on that boat. It was a cruise down the Nile from Luxor to Aswan, and said, I just will. And so sure enough, 10 days before the start of the trip, this was for her 50th birthday, and she had invited quite a few people to celebrate with her. And she said, Marianna, she's like, I have some person just literally is not coming now it's fully paid. Like, do you are you open? And something had happened where I thought I was going to be doing something at that time, and it fell through, and I was like, Oh, my goodness, yes, I'm coming. And I booked my tickets, really last minute, and I got to go to Egypt. And it was life changing. It was life expanding, life changing, incredible. And there was a lot there for me with earth keepers. I met another kind of medicine man at the temples there that just opened gateways and and I just, there's just so much to that, too. I mean, everything was so serendipitous. I met this incredible woman who is a TV film producer who's done the gaming thing as well. And everything was just so serendipitous again, and and so I ended up going to Egypt for a whole week in October. And it was, yeah, it was incredible.

Kate Harlow: 01:14:40

So I think the moral of this podcast, and I feel like we could talk, we'll probably do many episodes over the next well, forever. But the moral, the moral of this episode, you know, Valentine's week, the gift for you, for the lonely and broken hearted and for every single woman on planet Earth. Earth is that your life is in your hands and the hands of planet Earth, and this magical, extraordinary planet that we live on that is so synchronistic and so divine, even the most unbelievably painful things we go through, there's a deeper purpose to those things, and like we have a fantasy of how life should go and what it's supposed to look like, but that's not planet Earth. And, you know, we, we, we go through these portals and these these moments of deep grief and fear and loss and and pain. And so many people like you talked about earlier, I love when you described your old life as like the the life of suffering. So many people are just trapped in that life, right? And they're going to their doctor, and their doctor is giving them medication, which is keeping them numb from their pleasure and numb from their pain, and they're just like coasting by in this life of suffering, thinking that that's life, watching the news, watching media, like we're exposed to so much we're not supposed to know what's happening everywhere on Earth at all times, and all the bad things that are happening everywhere, like, just like how much distraction and how much the world around us can provoke and can contribute to your life of suffering because of where your attention is. And you know, hearing your stories, I'm so glad we ended with this, and you can say final words, of course, but like those stories, I'm so happy you shared the last year because you and then we went back to Kenya and had, like, a magical retreat in Kenya. And you know, you've had such an exquisite year, and I've watched you go on, like, magical journey after magical journey after magical journey. And you know, this is our life. And so many people are like, Ah, it's not the real world. It's like, yeah, it is our world. We live in it full time, like, full time. This is our life. And you know it doesn't meet. Does it come without painful moments? Of course, we have human we have painful moments, but so much more is available to all of us than we could ever know. And when you learn how to be in relationship with your pain and be in relationship with your pleasure, and learn how to how to and even practice everything we've shared with you today, the gift of taking your taking your feelings into your own hands, and taking your perceptions and projections and your blame and all those things into your own hands, and learning how to alchemize it, you will get you will too get to experience not a life of suffering, but a life, even through really painful experiences, a life of magical synchronistic you will see how supported you are. You will never feel alone, because you will see how much life is always supporting us so happy. Valentine's week, may you take your love and your heart into your own hands and really devote this year to living from the frequency of your own heart. Because there's nothing more beautiful and nothing that, nothing that will satiate you more than your the frequency of your own heart. So, yeah, What? What? What final words do you have for Valentine's week for the lonely and broken hearted or any woman? Yeah,

Marianna Ladas: 01:18:31

it's when you were talking just now. I just got the sensation when you know it's that difference of being a victim to life, that difference between being a victim to life and like taking that impact, like that place of empowerment, where you're living inside your heart, and then what happens is, is that you start seeing everybody as a reflection of your heart. Everyone it becomes a reflection of your heart, instead of your projections or your judgments or your subconscious, you know, limitations, and that's the difference. So we start going from that place that we were, which is the place of separation, which is the illusion, into the wholeness of who we really are, the real world. And that's what Kate and I are here to do. We're here to reintroduce and what that means the real world is Living from the heart and really experiencing the magic on a global level, where we get to celebrate that,

Kate Harlow: 01:19:51

yeah, earthquakes is going to support that. And also, I think we should also introduce here before we go, because this is a really, really epic. Mantra and reframe. I thought of it earlier when you're speaking, but I forgot, yeah, when your saboteur has all those stories, projections, blame, don't take the bait. Bait. That's one of our favorite things. Mariana and I catch each other like one of us will get swept by something for a minute, and then we catch each other right away. And she'll be like, you took the bait. And I'm like, oh shit, don't take the bait. You get some fun little thing. Yeah,

Marianna Ladas: 01:20:32

every time you catch yourself going down some rabbit hole, even with social media or whatever, and it's like, oh, then this thing and that thing, and I'm like, oh, man, I just took the bait on that so, or even the even with your thoughts, you know, just like I'm lonely, don't, don't, yeah, don't take the bait. It's a story turn. It's a

Kate Harlow: 01:20:52

story, yeah, exactly. Or ham it up and get go bigger with it, so you can feel what's underneath it, and then you can alchemize it. But don't take the bait. Like, if you notice, it's non stop. There's crises in the world constantly, and maybe you're here to constantly be fighting them and talking about them, and that's fine, it's choice. But maybe you're not like, maybe you don't have to take take the bait to talk about what's happening in politics and Who's In Who's this, and what's that, and what like Look over there, and that crisis and that crisis and that crisis, that crisis, we miss our own lives when we spend all our time taking the bait and just feeding the drama of everything else. It doesn't mean you're not going to feel the pain of the things that you hear about that are happening in the world and impacting the people you love and you know, people around the world, innocent people around the world. Of course, we're going to feel that on on some level, and like we always talk about feel it. But if you take the bait and you just stay in the arguing with reality and the conversation about that, you're missing your own world.

Marianna Ladas: 01:22:00

Yeah, and you're you're less. It's like we less contribute to creating a better one, right? It's like we spend all of this time, you know, bitching, moaning, complaining, judging, whatever, about this other reality, instead of actually creating a new one and offering that to the world, or your community or the your loved ones. It's like, where's the energy going, you know? And what is the frequency of the the output of that energy?

Kate Harlow: 01:22:31

Yeah, I'm so glad you said that. That's it. That's what this is learning how to alchemize your feelings and own your projections. Allows you, allows us, to create a new earth, right? And that coming back to Earth keepers, like we are, keepers of this earth. This is our Earth. And we when you live from the frequency of the you live from the frequency of the heart and the truth of who you are, we are alchemizing the earth. We are alchemizing all of that energy and creating a new world together, and that's what's possible. So Happy Valentine's week. From katiana, yes, Happy Valentine's week. That was so fun. I love you. It's so fun. It's so fun having conversations with you, because it's just like other other people getting that. Our phone calls are like this. We're laughing. Yes, connecting, storytelling, inspiring each other. It's and so that's the last thing. I'll leave galentines Go plan some plan some connection time this week with the women in your life who inspire you, who bring you higher, who drop you deeper into yourself, who inspire you, who uplift, uplift you. There's no way I'd be where I am in my life without you so and all my sisters, but you like you know a lot. Okay, love you Happy Valentine's week, and spread this message and this episode to all your sisters you know, in need of some love and connection and some practices this Valentine's week, we love you and we'll see you next week. Thank you. Marianna, thank you. Love you. Just love you. Hi, it's Kate. Thanks so much for listening to the new truth podcast for more of Katherine and I, come hang out with us in the new truth movement Facebook group we are in there. That's where we're sharing all about our programs and our free workshops that we do. You can come join us there and ask as many questions as you want about the podcast episodes about dating relationships, any struggles you're having out there, we would love to support you. So come hang out with us in the new troop movement Facebook group, and we will see you soon. You.